大学英语六级写作经典范文及点评（3）以个人魅力交流
Communicating a Sense of Personal Power
Communicating a sense of personal power comes from a belief that you can reach your goals in your own way. Powerful people give others power and encourage others to express themselves openly. You communicate a sense of personal power by developing these traits:
Authority
Authority is inner confidence a trust in your skills and abilities. It comes from the inside, from an attitude of I can do that. I deserve success.This attitude radiates outward as you assert your right, honestly ask for what you want and need, and develop a willingness to give to others and yourself.
Being self-assured
Self-assured behavior is active, direct, and honest. It communicates an impression of self-respect and respect for others.By being self-assured, we view our wants, needs, and rights as equal with those of others. A self-assured person wins by influencing, listening, and negotiating so that other people choose to cooperate willingly.
Accessibility
The powerful person is a master net worker. Good networking increases your visibility and gives you a valuable circle of people from whom you can give and receive support and information. Imagine yourself as the center of a wheel surrounded by spokes of contacts.
Image
You communicate power through your image. Do you project an image consistent with strong leadership①? Stand tall and walk proudly, remembering that you have value as a person. When you meet others, make direct contact and keep your handshake firm and friendly. Clearly state who you are and what you do.
Communication habits
Take a deep breath to project a firm voice. Avoid slang, and jargon, and vocal hesitations that can hinder effective communication. Use only the body movements and gestures necessary to make your point, no more. Learn how to write clearly and concisely.
[312 words]
行文点评
文章是总分结构。第一段先说明发挥你的个人魅力的信念你可以用自己的方式实现自己的目标。接着作者从五个方面介绍个人魅力的通常表现，每个方面作者都指明了它对发挥个人魅力的重要性，以及如何做到这一点。
以个人魅力交流
发挥你的个人魅力来源于这样一个信念：即你可以用自己的方式实现自己的目标。有影响力的人赋予他人力量并鼓励他人公开表述自己的意见。发挥个人魅力通常体现在以下几个方面：
威信
威信是内在的信心，即坚信自己的技能和能力。它来自于内心，来自于我能做好那件事、我会成功的态度。当你维护你的权利，真诚地去寻求你的所需所想，并愿意为他人和自己做出奉献的时候，这种态度就会外露出来。
自信
自信表现为积极、直率和诚实。它表达了一种自尊和尊重他人的意愿。通过自信，我们视自己的需求和权利与他人的需要和权利是平等的。一个自信的人通过影响、倾听与讨论来赢取他人自愿的合作。
亲和力
一个有影响力的人是人际交往的大师。良好的人际交往会使你为人所知，使你周围有一个高层次的人际关系网，从他们那里你可以给予或获得支持与信息。把你自己想象成轮轴，周围由关系的辐条环绕。
形象
你可以通过你的形象来施加影响力。你想象过自己具有极强的领导能力的形象吗?站直，昂首挺胸地前进，记住，作为一个人你自身具有价值。当你与他人会面时，要直接接触，友好而有力地握手。清楚地表达你是谁，是做什么的。
交流习惯
深吸一口气，说出坚定的话语，避免使用俚语、行话，说话不要吞吞吐吐，否则会影响有效的交流。在必要时使用身体语言和手势，多则无益。要学会如何用笔头清晰而简洁地表达自己的思想感情。
词汇斟酌
trait n. 显著的特点, 特性
authority n. 权威, 威信, 权威人士
radiate vt. 放射, 辐射, 传播
assert v. 断言, 声称
negotiate v. 商议, 谈判, 磋商,
accessibility n. 易接近, 可到达
spoke n. 辐条
slang n. 俚语
jargon n. 行话
佳句临摹
①【注释】be consistent with一致，相符
【临摹】What you said now is not consistent with what you said last week. 你现在说的话与你上星期说的话不相符。
思如泉涌
As a mans heart is, so does he speak. 言为心声。
A great talker is a great liar. 最会饶舌的人也是最会说谎的人。
Communicating a Sense of Personal Power
Communicating a sense of personal power comes from a belief that you can reach your goals in your own way. Powerful people give others power and encourage others to express themselves openly. You communicate a sense of personal power by developing these traits:
Authority
Authority is inner confidence a trust in your skills and abilities. It comes from the inside, from an attitude of I can do that. I deserve success.This attitude radiates outward as you assert your right, honestly ask for what you want and need, and develop a willingness to give to others and yourself.
Being self-assured
Self-assured behavior is active, direct, and honest. It communicates an impression of self-respect and respect for others.By being self-assured, we view our wants, needs, and rights as equal with those of others. A self-assured person wins by influencing, listening, and negotiating so that other people choose to cooperate willingly.
Accessibility
The powerful person is a master net worker. Good networking increases your visibility and gives you a valuable circle of people from whom you can give and receive support and information. Imagine yourself as the center of a wheel surrounded by spokes of contacts.
Image
You communicate power through your image. Do you project an image consistent with strong leadership①? Stand tall and walk proudly, remembering that you have value as a person. When you meet others, make direct contact and keep your handshake firm and friendly. Clearly state who you are and what you do.
Communication habits
Take a deep breath to project a firm voice. Avoid slang, and jargon, and vocal hesitations that can hinder effective communication. Use only the body movements and gestures necessary to make your point, no more. Learn how to write clearly and concisely.
[312 words]
行文点评
文章是总分结构。第一段先说明发挥你的个人魅力的信念你可以用自己的方式实现自己的目标。接着作者从五个方面介绍个人魅力的通常表现，每个方面作者都指明了它对发挥个人魅力的重要性，以及如何做到这一点。
以个人魅力交流
发挥你的个人魅力来源于这样一个信念：即你可以用自己的方式实现自己的目标。有影响力的人赋予他人力量并鼓励他人公开表述自己的意见。发挥个人魅力通常体现在以下几个方面：
威信
威信是内在的信心，即坚信自己的技能和能力。它来自于内心，来自于我能做好那件事、我会成功的态度。当你维护你的权利，真诚地去寻求你的所需所想，并愿意为他人和自己做出奉献的时候，这种态度就会外露出来。
自信
自信表现为积极、直率和诚实。它表达了一种自尊和尊重他人的意愿。通过自信，我们视自己的需求和权利与他人的需要和权利是平等的。一个自信的人通过影响、倾听与讨论来赢取他人自愿的合作。
亲和力
一个有影响力的人是人际交往的大师。良好的人际交往会使你为人所知，使你周围有一个高层次的人际关系网，从他们那里你可以给予或获得支持与信息。把你自己想象成轮轴，周围由关系的辐条环绕。
形象
你可以通过你的形象来施加影响力。你想象过自己具有极强的领导能力的形象吗?站直，昂首挺胸地前进，记住，作为一个人你自身具有价值。当你与他人会面时，要直接接触，友好而有力地握手。清楚地表达你是谁，是做什么的。
交流习惯
深吸一口气，说出坚定的话语，避免使用俚语、行话，说话不要吞吞吐吐，否则会影响有效的交流。在必要时使用身体语言和手势，多则无益。要学会如何用笔头清晰而简洁地表达自己的思想感情。
词汇斟酌
trait n. 显著的特点, 特性
authority n. 权威, 威信, 权威人士
radiate vt. 放射, 辐射, 传播
assert v. 断言, 声称
negotiate v. 商议, 谈判, 磋商,
accessibility n. 易接近, 可到达
spoke n. 辐条
slang n. 俚语
jargon n. 行话
佳句临摹
①【注释】be consistent with一致，相符
【临摹】What you said now is not consistent with what you said last week. 你现在说的话与你上星期说的话不相符。
思如泉涌
As a mans heart is, so does he speak. 言为心声。
A great talker is a great liar. 最会饶舌的人也是最会说谎的人。
